Let It Go...

Whew!

This past month has been such a great, relaxing, fast paced month for us!

Aaron was able to participate in a pastors conference in Louisville, KY. He had an amazing time with eight other guys. Louisville, being only hours from my Grandma, the kids and I were able to stay with her for a week. Oh, my goodness! I LOVED every minute of it. It was difficult to leave. There is something about family...something so precious.

The kids are doing well. Libbi is walking/running. Everywhere. All.The.Time. My busy little girl is learning words and climbing furniture. Her current favorites are Peanut Butter and Jelly sandwiches, Cheese, and crackers of any kind.

Cade is nearing the end of Second Grade. He is flying through his work and learning division, more about writing, and reading in about a 5th grade level. The kid amazes me. He also is working on his manners and obedience. (ugh) He is doing great, and it encourages mom and dad to stay a step ahead. *smile*

Guess what? I told you that I would have some news, and I do! My book is due out in about 6 weeks! EEKKK!!!! I'm excited/scared/terrified/thrilled all at once! Look for some more information soon. I'll hopefully be able to share the cover with you soon. It will be available through the publisher, Amazon, or Barnes and Noble, if you'd like a copy!

I have never been able to just "find a song" that fits my life so closely, so appropriately, and ironically so very close to the book coming out, as I have found in the song "Let it Go" from the movie FROZEN. By now, there are many covers on YouTube, and from other very talented people. My personal favorite is sung by Lexi Walker. (I'll include the video at the end.)

 

The snow glows white on the mountain tonight,

not a footprint to be seen.

A kingdom of isolation and it looks like

I'm the queen

The wind is howling like this swirling storm inside

Couldn't keep it in

Heaven knows I tried.

 

My life hasn't exactly gone "just as planned." While battling through Breast Cancer, I found that there were very isolated areas in my life as I tried to find my identity. I lived, in many ways, exactly how I felt would be appropriate for those around me, or what I imagined a "good Christian girl" should look like.

 

 

Don't let them in don't let them see

Be the good girl you always have to be

Conceal, don't feel, don't let them know.

Well, now they know!

 

Yes, people will know. In my book I've shared my personal struggles: my life, my heart, my dreams. I tried to hold nothing back. Yes, people will know the real me...and for the first time: I'm not afraid. Intimidated? Absolutely. Worried about rejection? The thoughts come and go. I'd be lying if I said they didn't. The past three years and the difficulty in walking them have taught me some priceless lessons. Lessons about loving myself, not hating. Loving others, regardless of how they have hurt me. Forgiveness, letting go of fears, and finding my identity are just a few.

 

It's funny how some distance

Makes everything seem small

And the fears that once controlled me

Can't get to me at all

It's time to see what I can do

To test the limits and break through...

I'm never going back

The past is in the past.

 

The answer is Jesus. It always has been and it always will be. The One and Only. Jesus. Fear has all but crippled me at times. Sucked the life out of me. But it is time to let it go. The fear that controlled me. The perfect life. The preconceived ideas about what my identity was supposed to look like. Where in the world would I be without you, Jesus? He is my identity, my portion. He continually speaks and pours grace out on us. His call to us is "Come." His gift to us is Himself. Perfect love. The most perfect of all love that has the power to cast out fear. Draw near to Him sweet friend, if but just one moment today. Let it go. Let all that you are holding on to, go. Free fall into His arms. It will be OK. I promise.