When Someone Else Is Talking...

I have been reminded of a valuable lesson.

I've completed my training at the three clinics I'll be working at. My goodness I had a great time! I love doing what I do. I forgot how much I loved it. The Doctors, staff, the patients...all of it.

My memory, skills and coordination were tested over this past month. Skills I haven't used in 13 years...and then some.

Everything I had to learn, from the Computer systems, new dosing, treatments, tubes, lab values, procedures...nothing prepared me for the realization that this world needs people who will listen. 

I never dreamed something so simple would mean so much. Oh, but it does.

Of Everything I did to prepare for this job, listening was key. At every turn, my trainers unknowingly taught me this. How I wish the world would teach us or offer a class on this. But they don't.

So WE NEED TO BECOME THE TEACHERS. 

Bless the brave girls...

that helped me train. Everyday they listen and hear between the lines. They fight battles unseen because sometimes, this body and this earth cannot do for us what we want it to. 

Make us happy.

ONLY GOD can bring this type of healing. And the world needs to hear this message!!! 

The difficult pill to swallow is one called "MORTAL." There's a difinitive beginning and ending.
And in order for us as "teachers" to be able to teach, we have to get really good at separating the truth from the lies because, words? They are POWERFUL. And in order to hear them, we need to listen.

And become the trainers that will teach truth...and train others to listen to TRUTH's voice.

In order to be heard we have to  LISTEN when Someone else is talking...

and give them Jesus.

Words, Work, Sharks and ALL the things...

Let's talk a minute about auto-correct.  I have a love/hate relationship with it. Before you consider becoming a full time, self advertised editor, I should let you know, there are a few errors.

For as "Smart" as my phone is, it CANNOT figure out that I am thanking the LORD for all the THINGS He is doing for people. How are they supposed to take me serious when auto-correct sends the message that I thank the "Lird for all the thongs." Bless the Lord, not Lird.

 At speech, Libbi was showing great interest in a marble run. I thought, "sure! A marble run.  We have one of those, and we can work on her speech homework while we do it." I dug through all the toys in the closet and came up with Cade's old one from several years back. We had never put it together. (Please don't tell grandma.) So I decided on this rainy day to have this bonding time with Libbi. You know, for one hot second have the appearance of having it together.

Three hours in, Aaron suggests I pitch the thing in the trash, because she probably wouldn't play with it anyway.

Perish the thought.

 The next time someone decides to give us a complicated Gift like that, somebody better hold my earrings.

I think I died a little through that "bonding" experience.

After a 13+ hiatus, this mama is going back to work! "Back in the day" I was a (full time) Medical Assistant; I'll be filling in at three different clinics, PRN. Fun stuff!!! The timing was perfect, which made the decision just that much easier!

Speaking of decisions, my sweet spouse made one for us this week that has left me speechless. He purchased a floating shark. ''Tis true. Be jealous. We are on probation for such things for all of eternity. He will no longer handle such matters.

I could go on, but I think I'll leave things right there. 

Easter is on us and I'm sending up prayers that Libbi won't be asked to help pick up communion cups after service. Last time, she  licked out EVERY cup she picked up. 

And I was the one who got strep throat. Jesus be near. 

Blessings, 

Erin 

Busy

 I've been a little busy lately.

 We went to Orlando for a week. Had a great time!  I will mention that we spent more on ER visits, urgent care,  and antibiotic's than we did at Disney. Folks--that's a lot. Poor Elsa, by the time we left her, she had a green smear on her dress. Bless all the Disney characters during the flu season! PS: we are all fine. I cannot say how the folks at Disney are doing.

And, I've been doing a little updating. Below are a few pictures that I took during my renovations. I like to paint, but mostly I do it so I can decorate at the end! ( that's our secret. ) There's a process here. My husband doesn't even hold his breath anymore.





And I have no idea where 

Yes, I do. I just recalled my youngest deleting all my before and after photos of the painting I just finished. And instead, she took this.
A special photo of her circle she drew on a screen shot of my group apps.  I think she has a gift. Of circles.

We've stressed over science fair projects and Math problems.

I've attempted wall displays a church. I'm just the lay-out crew. When it comes to hanging things..."good enough" is my favorite phrase. Not every one agrees.

I was back in the ER with little princess who was once again sick...thank you stomach flu. Thankful it wasn't her appendix. Never so glad to be wrong. ***who knew the flu caused knee-buckling-side-pain.

So on this snowy/grayish day, I'm taking advantage of the quiet. The kids are outside playing, and I am finishing up here. I had started painting this morning while trying to be productive when Libbi promptly put her whole self into the paint. Got it on the wall and in her hair and all over her shirt and pants and fingers and feet. You get the picture. We go the all in, as you can tell. We aren't quitters.

I don't have much to say except have a supercalifragilisticexpialidocious day. I wish for you a day of happy memories, sunshine, and a good dose of laughter. It'll cure what ails you.

Grace and peace,

Erin

A Series of Firsts...

 This week has been a lot of "firsts" for the Shafer family.
First time at speech therapy for Libbi.
First time at Taekwondo for Cade. There's a first time for everything.

 This girl amazes me with her resilience. Her busyness, her non-listening skills, and then her ability to laugh. At everything. I'm not sure where she gets that from. The laughing part, that is.

 Her therapy session for speech is at 8:30 in the morning.  On Mondays, every Monday, for the next six months. Let me just say, that's early.
 Bless the therapist. She (Libbi)  is up, but doesn't regularly "do" mornings.  She likes her cereal in her cartoons. In that order.

 I needed another reason to adore Mondays. Bless.

Her posture and whole demeanor changed when she learned how to say "s" like (her words) a "big girl!" She was so proud. At the end of class she even dropped her "Shark" she picked out (for an animal that begins with the letter "s") like a "mic-drop" moment.

The drama in our house never goes far.

Cade interviewed (and passed), and  began Taekwondo twice a week. He LOVES it! His teacher is  One of a kind; "excellence" comes to mind when I think of her.  She began her interview by asking how he treats people. His mom, dad, sister, friends, schoolmates, you get the drift. As he stood there listening, he had his arms folded. And she asked him to stop. Much to my surprise she said that would be the last time he would need to do that. As folding or crossing the arms is a sign of disrespect and no one deserves that.

That'll preach.

 As you can see, by the pictures, they believe in routine and discipline. This particular routine consisted of army crawls, running, skipping, whole body jump/leaps, and push-ups. Back-and-forth, back-and-forth, And back-and-forth until the instructor said they were done.

Every exercise is repeated at the beginning of the class.  One last thing to note, she has each student  salute the flag, by placing their hand over their heart and bow with their eyes the ground. Not out of another persons dominion, but out of submission. Interestingly enough, as I sat there relishing the 55 minutes of freedom from mommin', (don't judge), I was pulling out my Kindle on my phone when the     Pledge of Allegiance began. As one accord, the entire place stood to do their feet salute the flag.

Except me.

This was my FIRST DAY.

 I tried to convey that in my look that passed between myself and the instructor, as she turned and gave me the stink-eye.  I looked at the lady next to me as I jumped to my feet, and begin reciting the pledge.

All she said was "yeah".

***special thanks for the solidarity***

 You'd better believe I was the last one to sit down.
 I decided I was gonna ride out the reverence. For the flag of course.

So yeah, there's a first time for everything. And in some cases that a good thing.

Have a great weekend, y'all!

Hugs, Erin

Libbi turns 4!

Just how in the world did that happen! Libbi celebrated her 4th birthday. 

FOUR!!! 

It seems just like yesterday she had just come home from the hospital, fist raised in victory

 as sleep claimed her tired body. Birth is such hard work. 

My heart over-flows...

After my last post on "Disappointment," I heard from several of you. Its wonderful when we can be of encouragement to each other. Bless you for writing me and letting me know!! 

This cold weather has us wrapped tight and looking for warmer days. But not too quickly! Let them be little a bit longer. She still fits in my lap. This little lady, at four years old is still a petite little peanut. She loves peanut butter and Strawberry Jelly sandwiches; hates getting a bath if it includes washing (is there any other???). She adores and annoys her older brother and can hold her own through humor and jokes. And she can hold still long enough for me to get a few precious moments on camera! 

Since my photos didn't load from last week, I'll share one of my favorites from last week. 

Bless you for stopping in! 

Disappointment

 My mom recently gifted me a book.  I quickly sifted through some of the chapter titles and realized immediately that it was full of all sorts of wisdom and wit and things that I just didn't have time for. Sounds selfish I know, but hear me out. Each time  I see books like this one, it makes me feel guilty. Overwhelmed. And desperately failing for sure. My heart longs to have "time." To processes things. I just don't have that right now.  Not the kind of time to try to fix everything that's broken. You catch my drift. Sometimes when you're in this type of funk you just need Jesus in a big way--not guilt.

So late one night, I cracked it open and started to read.  I couldn't sleep anyway, so I thought why not!
 I read the chapter on bitterness, unforgiveness, overwhelming need, loving God, desperate feelings, all these things (such great things) and definitely needed, but I just wasn't tracking with it. It just didn't seem like these were the "issues" that I knew the Lord was gently working on in me. (And you'll know it's Him because He's gentle and kind.) And when he lets you know your "issues" liquid relief flows down your face. At least down mine.
I was fine...Until I got to disappointment.

One sentence that the author spoke to her child, I read over and over and over again.
"...fairness doesn't live here anymore. But Jesus does." (Sheila Walsh)

Disappointment that life just isn't  what you thought it would be. It didn't bring the things you thought you needed. It brought different. And with different,  change. Change of everything you knew, or dreamed of. Spelled out sometimes,  in unfairness. Disappointment.

Jesus came...in a big way.

Let me just clarify: I certainly struggle with the other things, but this one (Disappointment/fairness) is something the Lord and I have been playing tug-of-war over for some time now. Sometimes at mid-life or just in this life we find ourselves disappointed in every area of our lives. It can look dark and overwhelming.

When I shared this with Aaron, I told him that I don't want to hold this against God anymore. It was time to let it go. Just stop the negative self talk inside my head. To let go of this stronghold that's held our marriage in bondage at times.  I may not like what cancer has done to my body, but when I look at those pictures I see a person who is alive and well. And has all the rest of her life to work it off. It's a gift. And a gift that Aaron has learned to accept as well. Jesus is Emmanuel. God with us, even in our broken parts.

When I look at my little, I see a spicy little girl, who takes life by the hands. Both hands. Sometimes requiring all hands that are available.  (Like when she dumped laundry detergent ALL OVER THE FLOOR AT THE STORE, topped it off with a package of nerds she "found" in the candy isle she stood by as I cleaned the floor.) I see Jesus.

 When I look at my oldest I see one who challenges me with learning new things and the blessedness of parenthood (especially through the hormone years.) Again I see Jesus.

When I look at our church, I see goodness, growth, and that sometimes there's gonna be people that say mean things about myself or my kids or my man. All I can do is pray that their disappointment becomes the catalyst for change in their life. The catapult that will launch them into seeking the Lord with all their heart, and if it's not at our church, that they would go with God, to the place where he is leading. Bless and release, as my sister-in-law says. Jesus is near.

Fairness may not live here anymore, but Jesus does. And He's taken the Disappointment too and filled its place with His presence. Room for the fruits that His Spirit brings that can cultivate change in the world around me. Especially my own outlook.

So today, I bear my soul and tell you that no, my life is not perfect, but I love it. In fact I just finished researching whether or not I needed Poison Control or Charcoal at the ER as my spicey little girl broke a glittery baton and DRANK the contents.

God Bless every broken road that leads us to the cross. Wifin' is hard. Mommin' is tough. Preacher wifin' ain't for wimps. But...

There are times we have to learn to acknowledge (and DEAL with the fact) that sometimes life is unfair,  and disappointing...but it is  also good and funny (and we all needed a good laugh knowing that we will now poop glittery-sparkly poop for days.)

Let Jesus live with you today.

***I really did have DARLING pics to go with this blog, however they aren't loading and Libbi has now released the birds into the house. I must go...#obviously

Come, let us adore Him...

 It's a snow day tomorrow. The fire is crackling, Christmas lights are on, the kids are asleep, and there's quiet. Or relative quiet. Aaron has football on-so there's that.

 We are doing our best at catching up on all the Christmas movies out there. Hallmark classics, and even some oldies and goodies! As we were watching the Sound of Music tonight, Cade made the exclamation, "they make girls look like they are light as feathers or something. That's a lie! They are heavy as rocks!"

He is getting coal in his stocking.

 Every night, as the dark comes early, Aaron will get on his hands and knees and play superheroes with the kids. It is hysterical. Imagine if you will, grown man with a bright orange rope for his super power.  One minute he's the Flash, and the next minute he's the man with the magic power  of the golden rope. Libbi is queen Elsa with ice magic, and will yell screaming through the house, "don't worry I won't pull your heart out, I just take it out and keep it in my box. Nicely. Right mom?"

Umm, yeah.

 I've struggled this year as December 23 approaches. This date comes every year, but for this year my flashbacks are real, and vivid. I also remember how I felt reading about the Christ-child that year. The Emmanuel, God with us. He came near, and is still near. Perhaps it's because of how deeply Advent has impacted me this year that it made me remember.

 Earlier this week My mother-in-law had an appointment and had to be at the office by 6:45am. It was a cold morning, and the snow was  starting to fly, and the stars were  bright and shining. I smiled at Libbi and her Sleepy-eyed  and Tussled  hair functioning quite well for being disturbed from her slumber.  Because of the early hour and no provision for small children, I decided it would be a perfect time to go shopping. Because that's just what you do at 0-dark 30 in the morning.

So there I was...shopping, and killin'  time. Libbi was singing loud with powdered donuts in hand when I heard someone say my name. Who in their right mind would be out that early? And what would be the chances that It was my doctor?  The kind hearted soul who found my cancer. It had been 5 years since I've seen him. (He changed jobs.) We caught up on his life, his job, my kids, and Aaron.

We parted ways, said nothing about cancer,  and I knew without a doubt that the God of Abraham,  Jacob, & Isaac was still alive and well. That sorrow lasts for a moment and Joy, to the whole world, has come and will come in the morning. His call is always "where are you?" He longs for our time with Him. Even if we have to be reminded in the middle of Sam's Club that the God who is near is the God who hears. That in His presence our fears have no place. And at the sound of his voice, the darkness flees.

I would love to say that the Star of Bethlehem shone bright and that the angels were singing, and gathered all around to complete the moment, but the flourecent bulbs of Sam's Club and the repeated over-head-page for customer service assistance was all I heard.

But He was there.

And will be there for you- for me-for all of us.

Whatever you're carrying; hiding; seeking; grieving; celebrating; dreading; giving or getting this year, will never EVER STOP His presence. It's as unending as His love for each of us.

At the very end of every fear is "alone." And the greatest gift that ever was came and abolished that forever. We don't have to fear that or say it ever again in that context again, unless it's at this Christmas time when we raise our voices loud and sing that He ALONE is worthy, yes, it is Christ the King.

Come, let us adore Him.

Hugs to you and yours,

~ Erin