We are so blessed, aren't we? We woke up this morning, and today is a new day full of mercy and blessings. I stand continuallly amazed when I think of those things. And so often I am guilty of thinking that those things and His promises aren't enough.
I am continuing with my writing project. I am working on the 12th chapter and it is about Guilt. Guilt comes in all shapes and sizes. I was namely going to point out several aspects of it from a cancer patient's side....when the following story had me writing out some more thoughts on the very subject.
As you know, Aaron's father (David) has varying medical issues that require 100% care. Over the 5 years that he has been home, we have had nurse after nurse, after nurse come into the home and work/care for David. Until the last two (Syndee and Jana) we were about out of hope that there was truly honest, and hard working individuals out there who could do this job.
That being said, I was shopping in town and ran in to a woman we will name "Smiles". She worked for us for some time and we all became quite settled with the routine that we had developed. After a couple of months she began displaying some behavior that is less than stellar, but being in the situation we were, we felt limited and loathed letting her go.
When she saw me, she immediately tried to get away as fast as she could. I stopped and spoke to her saying "hello" and "It is nice to see you again. How have you been?" Thinking that since it has been several years, she may not recognize me, and so forth....I said, "Oh! Do you remember me? I am so and so....." before I could finish speaking, "Smiles" said "Oh yes I do! Come on (to the person she was with), lets get away from HER!"
Some relationships have a lot of water under the bridge. This one in particular was a "toxic" relationship that ended well, or so we thought. I was stunned that she responded so harshly. I was embarrassed that she reacted like that, in the store no less, when she was in NO position to be acting like that. The more I thought about it, the madder I became. "How dare she....", "I should have said.....", were among the thoughts coursing through my mind. Then I stopped, repented and immediately felt guilty. Why? I probably would have been within my "rights" to react like she did, but I also have Jesus in me and everything within screamed "STOP! Turn the other cheek....Love her....She needs Jesus."
But, even that last statement left me feelings of guilt, because she claims TO know Christ. I am not in a position to judge the heart, so why even think such things?
The sad thing here, is even CHRISTIANS act like Smiles did. Why? Because when we have done something to someone or done something we are ashamed of, it is easier to take the "justified" route, instead of accepting the responsibility that is ours. Out of our own guilt, we often place the weight of our own burden on the one we have wronged, while they are trying desperately to come to terms with the "new normal" for them. It isn't an easy road, but their own burden is so heavy that they cannot bear the weight of any more- much less one that is undeserved or misplaced. Navigating through their own emotions/burdens is all they can manage at present.
Believe me...I have totally been the one causing scenes before....thinking I was fixing things. But BOTH sides are wrong. Neither party is in a position to act out at the other, or to with-hold forgiveness from the other. Hurting people, hurt people. We all act badly, when we shouldn't.
As this relates to cancer, disabilities or other related things, people often times don't know what to or how to act after the newness of another persons situation comes to light. They place an "expectation" on that person to act the same, be the same and cause as little a disturbance as possible in their life, because the bottom line is selfishness. They (Or we- if we are in that position) don't want to change. They(we) don't want this to happen to them/us....so let's not be around them. Be disrupted from our lives, and heaven-forbid we become uncomfortable on the behalf of another person. So, what do we so often do? We give the other person a guilt trip. Or like "Smiles" did, treat someone with disrespect, with-hold forgiveness, etc....all because we cannot come face to face with our guilt/responsibility.
Own up to when you have wronged someone...you will look more like Jesus.
Forgive quickly....it displays Christ on your face.
Don't judge others based on what you yourself don't want to do, or didn't do when you knew you should have....Christ didn't come to condemn, He came to save. (John 3:17 "For God did not send his Son into the world to condemn the world, but to save the world through him.")
Bottom line.......LOVE. 1 Cor 13:4-7 "Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres."
Love people to LIFE. (John 3:16 "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life.") Be the Jesus for the world to see. Let's obey Him and learn to live like him.
Guilt is a dangerous weapon used by the enemy to stop many from coming to Christ, and used too often by Christians who hold others and ultimately themselves in bondage.
Victory in Jesus is just one action away, one word of kindness-away, one refusal to do wrong-away, and one act of forgiveness away from each and every one of us.
Cade likes to sing Christmas Carols. Right now he is singing "Hark, the Herald Angels Sing". When he gets to "Peace on earth, and mercy mild God and sinner reconcile" His version goes like this...."Peace on earth and Mercy filed....God has sinners to reconcile." Oh, I wish it were so simple, but it isn't. It requires us to make a difficult choice between what we "want" to do and what we "need" to do.
Don't stand in the darkness any longer. The day has dawned anew, and with it- NEW MERCIES. Fall at the feet of Jesus and find your rest. Find your freedom, and live a life worthy of Him and free....from guilt.
"That's what Christmas is all about, Charlie Brown..."
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